The Dairy of Doctor Bong

The Opener

Good morning teachers, Good morning Gentlemen.

*waits for the grand acknowledgement*

thinks: LOL BOW to me you unworthy minions.

Today, I renewed the contract with the Fhristalite Methodist Home that specifies that we have to send a class down there at least once every week. Mr Lim of the Home tells me that the members of the Home have taken to donning ACS attire in respect of their kind helpers. Well done school.

I would also like to commend Evin Wong and Haun Lee for their magnaminous and selfless efforts in undeceitfully returning this laptop to its "rightful" owner.

Speaking of which, I would like to ask the person who lost his tablet PC to give a big shout.

"Someone from 1.6 or 1.7 shouts out Dr BONG WO YONG YUAN HUI ZHI CHI NI"

I would now like everyone standing within 2 metres of him to give him a tight slap at anywhere you please.

"Someone from 1.6 or 1.7 screams out in pain"

Thank you. Let's now give a round of applause to the National Poliz Caddy Cadet Company Corps (Space) for a uninspiring and generally depressing flag-raising involving the flag being ripped into half.

*Catcalls and applause from the audience. I am great, I am worthy of their applause. 2000+ people look to me as their leader, I have responsibiities.*

At this point, the usurper, Bongar, comes forth with some of his boring messages about latecoming and littering the basketball courts and whatnot.

Some day, I believe he will take a very sharp cleaver and behead me in my office. I shall have to remove him the way I removed SeaKeng. I shall ring up my dear friend Bosef Stalin in north-western Azerbaijan and ask him to arrange a "disciplinary" post for Bongard. He can be the flogging boy in the Hagir Prison.

On another note, I shall have to apologize to my dear Fann for betraying her all these years. I have put my personal feelings ahead of my professional conduct in promoting Yvonna. Soon, I shall give her a post in the Woodlands Correctional Facility, and then I can be reunited with my three wives. It is a good thing I chose to be Windu. This religion allows me to have more than one wife, up to five wives.

The Windu religion was said to be formed by an ancient warrior by the name of Mace.

That is all for today. You may return to your cramped and stuffy classes.

Let Project Poison proceed as planned. Soon, complete dominance of secondary school education will be ours.

posted by the_dr3@m3r @ 6:53 PM